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Download AlchemistCookbook2.ipt
The Alchemist's Cookbook v2
Complex Recipes, Ruminations, and Potions

This material is Open Game Content, and is licensed for public use under the terms of the Open Game License v1.0a.

Ingredients
  • 15 fluid ounces powdered Vefli woodpecker oil
  • 1 ounce Thriilbryn salpiglossis juice
  • 1 ounce shredded Uloue crocus
  • 1/10 quart coleus stem
  • 1/8 quart cayenne juice
  • 1 fluid ounce Adoni angelica
  • 1 cup Ci'siesuvgr turmeric seeds
  • 1/3 teaspoon distilled Ikarb cockatrice
  • 1/3 pint shredded gaillardia leaves
  • 23 ounces powdered Nielasnæniel cucumber
  • 1/6 ounce diced baobab root
  • 1/2 teaspoon orc
  • 1 cup dried chicken
  • 1 pound dried nettle
  • 1 pound sliced Prietpa thrift
  • 1/10 teaspoon stewed Ininus licorice
  • 13 pints fresh Rinowas savory flowers
  • 1 pound diced Coreu candytuft oil
  • 2 tablespoons Kryseirindion alligator
  • 1 pound fluorite shards
  • 1/8 gallon diced lizardman
  • 1/2 tablespoon chopped hawk
  • 1 quart partially hydrogenated scandium
  • 8 fluid ounces frozen Siervyab'qur'vye arugula
  • 9 pounds partially hydrogenated Dufromli kalanchoe
  • 1 teaspoon Girkwige mouse


  • Ointment Directions
    Grind all the ingredients with a mortar in a double boiler and add to enough water to make a thick, but flowable mixture.
    Add the decoction to olive or other vegetable oil, and simmer until the water has completely evaporated.
    Add beeswax as needed to get a firm consistency.
    Place the firm mixture into a different double boiler and melt the mixture by heating slowly, and stir until completely blended.

    Notes - Sorted by Age and Relevance*
    * Because of variations in test conditions, recorded studies may have yielded wildly varying results. Ultimately it is up to the GM to interpret these results.

    Taenea, Nefecclement, Pascrunea's scrolls showed that there is a 80% chance this recipe may cure age reversal, autism, automysophobia (fear of being dirty), demon fever, dizziness, gender changes, haptophobia (fear of touch), headaches, hemorrhoids, itching, menorrhagia, rosacea, temperature 3°F warmer than normal, tropophobia (fear of change). Do not use if you or a family member are pregnant, nursing, of childbearing age, have a history of or are at risk from adenocarcinoma, black lung, coronary heart disease, dengue, diverticulitis, lymphoma, melanoma, multiple sclerosis. If negative symptoms persist, see a witch immediately.

    Chithon, Skya's encyclopedia indicated that true neutral and lawful neutral aligned characters have up to 13% immunity to 1/9 of the effects of this recipe.


    Siatuas's handbook concluded that there is a 91% chance that character will become addicted or dependant to the recipe. Addiction will require 7+(Number of days addicted) successful Will savings rolls in a row to cure.

    Tenrilasrlan, Aenædas, Tylelilbrion's journals concluded that successful saves do not allow the character to recover. Only magical healing can save the character.

    Locrerte, Quemniin, Loscinui's manuals concluded that when damaged by this recipe, character must succeed on another saving throw or 7 points of damage is permanent drain instead.

    Sedus's grimoires indicated that there is a 81% chance that the cook will obtain a magical immunity to 63% of the side-effects.

    Asdyse, Rhoinuse's study showed that there is a 88% chance that additional servings will relieve any negative symptoms by a factor of 8.

    Frastuso, Felentem, Adpoet's records indicated that 35% of people who used this recipe were cured of the following symptoms: atopy, bad breath, choking, demon fever, difficulty swallowing, ectopic pregnancy, ergophobia (fear of work). Do not use if you or a family member are pregnant, nursing, of childbearing age, have a history of or are at risk from cellulitis, cold and fever symptoms, epilepsy, glaucoma, hyperactive thyroid, lymphoma, polio, trachoma. If negative symptoms persist, see a medicine man immediately.

    Iamnospes's studies indicated that sorcerer's have a 28% immunity to the effects of this recipe.

    Quosdehaecce, Huicice's tome showed that Halfling, Dwarf, Gnome, and Drow's are at 49% more risk to any effects of this recipe.

    Hoclatien, Penius's observation showed that Firedrake's have up to 92% immunity to any effects of this recipe.

    Kylilries, Thraænasas's observations concluded that Goblin's have a 57% immunity to any effects of this recipe.

    Gordrin's codexes showed that Roc, Zombie, Fire Giant, Giant Ant, Kolbold, and Jinn's are at 46% more risk to 1/3 of the effects of this recipe.

    Gadejius, Obreyu, Exylatus's journal showed that bard and paladin's have a 24% immunity to 1/9 of the effects of this recipe.

    Laboratory studies have concluded there is a 40% chance that any illnesses contracted from eating this recipe are not communicable. All players within 348 feet must make a Fortitude saving roll or risk becoming infected.

    Tylrini, Tyrædorbrien, Eleirilbrrieth's tomes indicated that this may cause the following symptoms: acarophobia (fear of small objects), acrophobia (fear of heights), aneurysm, angina, anthophobia (fear of flowers), antlophobia (fear of floods), artificial insemination, artificial insemination, artificial insemination, autophobia (fear of loneliness), bedwetting, cackle fever, chills, clinophobia (fear of beds), cnidophobia (fear of insect stings), cometophobia (fear of comets), delierium, ecclesiophobia (fear of churches), freckles, hallucinations, headaches, height shrinkage of at least 3 inches, iatrophobia (fear of doctors, hospitals), inability to cast any spells, itching, kidney failure, melophobia (fear of music), priapism, skin color changes, symbolophobia (fear of symbols, magic), upset stomach, vertigo, vomiting, warts. Do not use if you or a family member are pregnant, nursing, of childbearing age, have a history of or are at risk from adenocarcinoma, blastomycosis, cholera, Crohn's disease, lockjaw, shingles, snail fever, stroke. If negative symptoms persist, see a healer immediately.

    Eredramius, Crikro, Lish's manuals indicated that Human, Elf, Ogre, and Goblin's have a 77% immunity to any effects of this recipe.

    Legos's records showed that lawful good aligned characters are at 1% more risk to the effects of this recipe.

    Iusedia, Eeuttia's records indicated that lawful evil and neutral evil aligned characters are at 96% more risk to 1/3 of the effects of this recipe.

    Tuaelela, Tanosus's tests showed that barbarian, ranger, farmer and cleric's are at 74% more risk to 1/5 of the effects of this recipe.

    Thrablagora's studies indicated that Kobold's are at 73% more risk to the effects of this recipe.

    Olyum, Prinapona's encyclopedias indicated that druid's are at 100% more risk to any effects of this recipe.

    Personal report indicated that the victim must make 8 successful Fortitude saving throws in a row to recover from any illnesses caused from this recipe.

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